Learning to Grieve from Each Other: Intuitive and Instrumental Grievers

Grief is a complex process that can manifest in different ways. Some people approach grief from an "intuitive" perspective, which focuses on emotional expression and processing, while others approach grief from an "instrumental" perspective, which focuses on practical tasks and problem-solving. While these approaches may seem very different, they can actually complement each other and help individuals heal in unique ways.

Intuitive grievers tend to be more focused on emotional expression and processing. This can include activities like talking about feelings, journaling, creating art, or participating in support groups. These activities can help intuitive grievers work through their emotions and find meaning in their loss. They may be more likely to seek out emotional support and engage in self-care practices.

Instrumental grievers, on the other hand, tend to be more focused on practical tasks and problem-solving. This can include activities like organizing a funeral, settling an estate, or making arrangements for children. These activities can help instrumental grievers maintain a sense of control and agency during a difficult time. They may be more likely to seek out practical support and engage in goal-oriented activities.

While these approaches may seem different, they can actually complement each other in important ways. Intuitive grievers can learn from instrumental grievers by incorporating practical tasks into their healing process. This can help them maintain a sense of control and agency during a difficult time. For example, they might focus on organizing their living space or setting up a routine to help them feel more in control.

Instrumental grievers can also learn from intuitive grievers by incorporating emotional expression and processing into their healing process. This can help them work through their emotions and find meaning in their loss. For example, they might try journaling or talking with a therapist to help them process their grief.

Overall, it's important to remember that grief is a highly individualized experience. There is no one "right" way to grieve, and what works for one person may not work for another. By learning from each other and incorporating both intuitive and instrumental approaches, individuals can find a healing process that works best for them.

In conclusion, intuitive and instrumental approaches to grief can complement each other and help individuals heal in unique ways. By learning from each other and incorporating both approaches, individuals can find a healing process that works best for them.

References:

Currier, J. M., Holland, J. M., & Neimeyer, R. A. (2006). Sense-making, grief, and the experience of violent loss: Toward a mediational model.